Monday, August 23, 2010

GETTING EVEN ISN'T EVEN

I Samuel 24:12 “May the Lord judge between you and me. And may the Lord avenge the wrongs you have done to me, but my hand will not touch you.”

“Have you been wronged, mistreated, annoyed or ignored? Is someone tormenting you beyond what you can bare? Are you ready for some PAYBACK?! Explore our site and find piles of good ideas and novelties.” Thus begins the description for the web site: Revenge Unlimited. Here you can buy from their store, read from their stories of successful revenge and get even with those who have wronged you. The site puts as their purpose/mission statement: “Revenge Unlimited believes that there are people in desperate need of a good dose of humility and we exist to help you make sure they get it!” Then, it does give this disclaimer: “By entering this site you agree that you take full responsibility for your actions.”

Revenge: It may be one of life’s most subtle temptations. All of us probably at one time or another have wanted to get even for being mistreated. Maybe it was because an employer promised you something and never came through. Maybe a mate walked out on you when you needed him or her the most. Maybe it was a parent who failed you or someone in the church who hurt you or has not appreciated your efforts. And now you are waiting for the chance to get even or you’re seething inside because you are holding a grudge.

Most of our culture today doesn’t recognize it as revenge. It is called "my rights." Or in our more educated moments we call it "justified retaliation." We’ve got a moral obligation to rectify this situation and it is the American way- "I don’t get mad - I just get even." But whatever we call it, God calls it revenge. And his feelings toward personal vengeance are anything but ambivalent. God very clearly commands us through the Bible that if there is to be any "getting even", we are to leave it for him to do. Why is God so adamant about resisting this temptation? Because he knows what it does to us and others. He knows the resentment that poisons us and the pain we inflict upon others by getting even is never in anyone’s best interest.

But how do we resist? Especially when the feelings are so strong within us? Our scripture shows that this subtle temptation even reaches into a life as exemplary as David’s. And from his excellent example of submitting to God’s will, instead of taking revenge, we can find principles for our own lives.

Let’s realize that it is a natural temptation to want to get back at someone who mistreats us. David was wronged by his superior, King Saul. Even though David had been a devoted servant, Saul became so intensely jealous of him, that he plotted to kill him. Surely, it would have been easy for David to want to get back at the king. Yet when given an opportunity to get Saul once and for all, David refuses to fight in the same manner as Saul. He doesn’t run his sword through the king. Instead he sneaks up and cuts off a portion of Saul’s robe. Now some may say, “wow, what restraint by David.” But quickly David realizes that even that childish act is an attempt at revenge. And all of a sudden he whispers, "Wait a minute! I was wrong to show such disrespect to the Lord’s appointed leader."

The most important principle here is not to give in to revenge. We are not to have the attitude of "Do it unto others before they do it unto you." We are not to fight in like manner. You know, God doesn’t give us this command to resist revenge because he wants us to be cowards or because the person doesn’t deserve punishment. Jesus’ teaching of "turning the other cheek" and forgiveness is because God knows what is best for us. You see, we need to admit that when we get even we really don’t win. Getting even isn’t ever even. We really only hurt ourselves. It festers within and poisons our spirits when we hold grudges or take revenge. We become no better than those who hurt us. Rick Warren said, “If you don’t release those who hurt you, you will begin to resemble them." We only hurt ourselves when we take matters into our own hands. We lose God’s peace and sink to the depths of the hurter instead of becoming a healer. Sir Francis Bacon said, "In taking revenge a man isn’t even with his enemy he is only as low as they. But in passing over it he becomes superior, for it is a prince’s part to pardon."

So, how should we view revenge? Realize that vengeance is a natural temptation but refuse to fight in a like manner. Keep our mind on the goal and trust in God’s ultimate justice and say, “May the Lord judge which of us is right and punish the guilty one. He is our advocate. He will rescue us”

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